For many parents, choosing a guardian for their children in their will is the one decision that stalls an otherwise finished document. Everything else, the assets, the executor, the specific gifts, feels manageable. This one feels impossible. There is no perfect candidate, and it can feel like naming someone is admitting that something terrible might happen. The goal here is not to find a flawless choice. It is to find the right choice for your family, write it down, and move forward. This guide walks through how to think about the decision and what to do once you have made it.
What Does Naming a Guardian in Your Will Actually Do?
When you name a guardian in your will, you are formally expressing who you want to raise your children if both parents die or become unable to care for them. This applies to children under the age of 18.
In most Canadian provinces, courts give significant weight to a parent’s expressed wishes. While the court retains final legal authority to appoint a guardian, naming someone in your will is the clearest possible signal of your intentions, and judges generally follow it unless there is a compelling reason not to.
It is worth understanding the distinction between a guardian and a trustee. A guardian is responsible for the day to day care and upbringing of your children. A trustee manages any assets or inheritance left to your children until they reach an age you specify. These can be the same person or different people, which is covered further below.
What Happens If You Don’t Name a Guardian?
If both parents die without a named guardian, the court decides who raises your children with no guidance from you at all.
This can create real difficulty for your family. Multiple relatives may believe they are the right choice, leading to disagreement or even formal disputes during an already painful time. While the court process unfolds, your children may end up in a temporary care arrangement, sometimes with a family member and sometimes through provincial child welfare services, until a permanent decision is made.
Naming a guardian in your will does not guarantee a particular outcome, but it gives the court clear direction and gives your family one less thing to fight about during a difficult time. For more on what happens when there is no will in place at all, read our guide on dying without a will in Canada.
How to Choose a Guardian for Your Children
There is rarely an obviously correct answer here. Most parents are choosing between several reasonable options, each with different strengths. Here is a practical framework for thinking it through.
Shared values. Consider how closely the candidate’s values align with your own around education, faith, discipline, and the kind of life you want for your children. This does not require an exact match, but significant differences are worth thinking through carefully.
Parenting style. Someone with young children of their own, or recent experience raising children, may have a more realistic sense of what the role actually involves day to day. This is not a requirement, but it is a meaningful factor.
Existing relationship with your children. A guardian your children already know and feel comfortable with reduces the disruption they would face during an already difficult transition. Consider how close the relationship is now, not just how close it could become.
Age and health. Think realistically about whether the candidate will be physically and mentally able to care for your children for the years required, particularly if your children are young. A grandparent might be a wonderful guardian for a teenager but a difficult choice for an infant.
Financial stability. The guardian does not need to personally fund your children’s upbringing. Your estate and any life insurance proceeds can cover much of that. But financial stability still matters for day to day practicality and reduces strain on the household.
Willingness. This is the factor most parents skip, and it matters enormously. Confirm that the person you are considering is actually willing to take on this responsibility before you name them. This is covered in more detail below.
Geographic location. Consider whether moving your children to a new city, province, or school would add unnecessary disruption on top of an already difficult situation. This is not a deciding factor on its own, but it is worth weighing.
No candidate will score perfectly across every factor. The goal is finding the best overall fit, not a perfect one.
Should You Name One Guardian or a Couple?
Many parents consider naming a married or common-law couple, such as a sibling and their spouse, rather than a single individual.
There are advantages to this approach. It provides built-in support for the guardian, and your children gain two committed caregivers rather than one. It also reflects the reality that the couple will likely be raising your children together in practice.
There is one consideration worth planning for. If the couple later separates or divorces, your will does not automatically resolve who keeps the guardianship role. For this reason, some parents name one specific individual as the legal guardian, even within a couple, while clearly expressing in writing that they intend for both partners to be involved in raising the children. This gives clarity if the relationship changes later while still reflecting your actual wishes.
There is no universally right answer here. Naming an individual or a couple are both valid approaches. What matters is thinking through the possibility of change and deciding how you want that handled.
Naming an Alternate Guardian
Just as you name an alternate executor and alternate beneficiaries, you should name an alternate guardian in case your first choice is unable or unwilling to serve when the time comes.
Circumstances change. Your first choice may move abroad, develop health issues, or simply no longer feel able to take on the responsibility years after you originally asked them. This is one of many reasons to review your will at least once a year. An alternate ensures your children are not left without a clear plan if your first choice cannot follow through.
Apply the same framework above to choose your alternate. It does not need to be a close second to your first choice. It needs to be a genuinely good option in its own right.
Talking to the Person You Want to Name
Before you finalize your will, have a direct conversation with the person you intend to name as guardian. This step is easy to skip and important not to.
Why this matters. Naming someone as guardian without asking first can create a difficult situation if the time ever comes and they feel unprepared or unwilling. A conversation ahead of time allows them to genuinely consider what the role would involve and decide honestly whether they are able to take it on.
What to discuss. Be specific about what you are asking. Share your parenting values and expectations. Discuss practical realities like where your children would live and how the financial side would work through any trust you set up. Give them room to ask questions and think it over rather than expecting an answer on the spot.
What if they say no. This is a meaningful and valid answer. Better to know now and choose someone else than to discover their hesitation only if the situation ever arises. Thank them for their honesty and move to your next consideration.
Separating Guardianship from Financial Trusteeship
It is worth understanding that you do not have to combine the caregiving role and the financial management role in one person.
The guardian raises your children day to day. The trustee manages any money or assets your children inherit until they reach an age you specify, often 18, 21, or 25 depending on your wishes. These can be the same person, or they can be different people entirely.
Some parents choose to separate these roles deliberately. A sibling who would be a wonderful caregiver might not have strong financial management experience, while another family member or a professional trustee might be better suited to managing investments responsibly on your children’s behalf. Separating the roles allows each person to focus on what they do best, while a system of checks exists between the guardian’s requests and the trustee’s approval of expenses.
There is no requirement to separate these roles, but it is worth considering if one obvious choice for caregiver does not feel like the right choice for financial management, or the reverse.
Making the Decision and Moving Forward
Choosing a guardian for your children in your will is rarely easy, and it does not need to be perfect. It needs to be thoughtful, honest about the realities of your specific family, and put into writing so it actually carries weight if it is ever needed.
Once you have made this decision, the rest of your will can move forward. WillKit guides you through naming a guardian as part of the overall process, alongside your executor, beneficiaries, and assets, all in plain language. A complete, legally valid Canadian will costs $59 and takes about 20 minutes to complete.
Start your will at will-kit.ca
This article provides general information only and does not constitute legal advice. Guardianship laws vary by province and may change over time. If you have specific questions about your situation, consult a qualified estate lawyer in your province.
Sources:
Canada.ca — Wills and estate planning: General legal framework, authoritative citation
Provincial Children’s Law legislation (e.g. Ontario Children’s Law Reform Act): Court authority over guardianship decisions
